Communism meets Capitalism

“Originally opened in 1939 as the All-Union Exhibition of Agriculture (promoting a decade of collectivization), this is Stalinist architecture at its most grandiose and free market enterprise at its most indifferent...” advertises my travel book on the VDNKh park. And it really is, too!

Stalin loved giant architecture and and huge walkways, so that's exactly how the park is laid out. The entire park is filled with giant, elaborately-designed pavilions and covered in huge statues of peasants (typically carrying a sickle, ax, wheat, or some combination thereof). As all of the buildings were essentially originally intended to demonstrate the greatness of the USSR, I expected to come upon some historical information or a museum of Soviet history. However, capitalism has taken root here – and in the worst way possible.

Each pavilion represents a different Soviet republic. Rather than providing information on each republic, however, many of these pavilions are filled with a maze of kitchy kiosks offering overly-priced dollar-store rejects. You can find any piece of crap here your heart could possibly desire: lava lamps, goth bracelets, plastic Samurai swords... really, it's a White Elephant party gift dreamland. Any pavilion that isn't filled with kiosks has a restaurant instead.

My friends & I should have suspected as much as we were walking up to and around the park. The park sidewalks are lined with dozens of cheap theme park games (“Hit one of the targets and win a bear!!”) and massive bouncy-castles. (Honestly, I've never seen so many bouncy-castles in my life. I didn't actually even really realize there was a market for these things...and certainly not in a Soviet-era park.) After wandering around completely befuddled, we decided to stop in one of the many outdoor restaurants in the park.

We looked at the prices at one location, thinking they seemed decent. What we didn't realize was that the prices were by weight, not by item. So my friends and I sat, thrilled at the food that was coming our way... big chunks of freshly-grilled meat, surrounded by a fanciful salad, beautifully displayed. Soft bread... And potatoes! Oh, the potatoes! Well, it was all just wonderful. And to top it off, our server was actually helpful, possibly the most helpful server we've had yet. (After being in Russia, I will never again take decent, friendly service for granted.) We clearly had trouble communicating in Russian, so he would bring us examples of the food so that we could choose to order that particular item or not. Also – and most importantly – he opened up an employee bathroom for me so that I wouldn't have to use one of the nasty port-o-potties in the park! I was thrilled with the food, and the service! Ah, I decided, this man was going to get a big tip.

Well, then the bill came. At more than $50 per person, it was more than twice what we'd paid for any other meal, and in nice restaurants! “What??” we immediately thought, “$50 for a bit of meat, some veggies, bread and water??! And in outdoor park seating, with plastic forks that break mid-meal? Ridiculous!” (A generous tip had already been included in the full cost of the meal; I wonder how many other people had been surprised by the final bill.) Well, we paid up, clearly. And I couldn't be too upset... yes, it's possible that he ripped us off. Yes, it's possible that we paid more than twice what a Russian would pay. At the same time, I was thankful for my generously-portioned meal with US-style service, even if it didn't come with a smile. Also, Russians will pay money for anything if they are able, just because its a symbol of status. Really, anything.* Maybe the park caters to those sorts. After all, as we were leaving, we noticed that one ride on the Ferris Wheel would have cost nearly $10. Clearly, when communism meets capitalism, it's not very pretty.

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*This is actually great for businesses that can take advantage of Russians' desire for “premium” brands. According to a TNK-BP representative who spoke to our Russian Energy Policy class, the company's premium “Ultimate” gas brand makes up a mere 5-10% of sales in Europe. In Russia, however, it accounts for a full 30%. Like I said, plenty of Russians will pay more for absolutely anything if they can....