Three multi-course meals a day with snacks and coffee in-between, heaps of salmon, desserts that make your mouth water, incredible sauces poured generously over anything that looks too low-calorie....ah, cruise dining!* How can a girl help but gain at least a few pounds on one of these trips?
Well, I've discovered the secret: come down with gastroenteritis!! Why, after a mere day or so of throwing up in your stateroom, you won't even want to look at the menu! (The number of cases on our little ship would suggest that this is our fellow passengers' favored weight-loss program as well.)
Naturally, gastroenteritis does have its drawbacks. For one, you may miss some of the sites – but really only if you're unambitious. In my strong determination to see the incredible wooden 22-domed 18th Century church on the little island of Kizhi, I trekked out with the rest of the ship for the excursion. Admittedly, I did have to head back early and was, to my embarrassment, unable to reach the facilities in time on the return journey. So a lovely group of 30 or so tourists got to watch me heave up my lunch, with the beautiful Transfiguration Church in the background. But hey, at least I saw the church!
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*You may be thinking to yourself, “Wait, I thought you were going to study in Moscow – what's this about a cruise??” Yes, I was studying in Moscow. However, my mother will use any excuse to travel, my dad will follow my mother anywhere, and my brother has a tendency to tag along for the ride. So my parents & brother flew over to Russia to join me for a 13-day incredible river cruise from Moscow to St. Petersburg!
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